Life does not consist of some happy days, and we all periodically upset. Regardless of whether it happened for a serious occasion or because of trifles, these feelings are extremely important for us, and stay without support and help at the time of sadness is very hard.
Attention! It will be doubly hard for girls who, as you know, more emotional than men, and more often show their sadness and bad mood.
But, faced with female sadness and especially with tears, many men are lost and do not know how to console their beloved.
So how to calm the girl and not to do worse?
How not to behave?
Support is the separation of the feelings of another person, the conviction of him is that he is not alone in his trouble.
However, in our culture, under support and sincere care, completely different things are often understood:
- Locking stranger,
Turning to such techniques, you not only do not calm the girl, but also risks forever to push it away from yourself. Therefore, for a start, we will understand what you do not need to do, even with the most so good intentions.
It's no secret that negative emotions, like a cold, can be "infected", and stay calm next to a crying person, especially if he is dear to you, not so simple.
But in order to calm the other, you need to be calm yourself.
So first breathe, exhale if you need - Count up to 10 before you start talking.
Also a good solution will bring a glass of water to yourself and a girl. And only then proceed directly to consolation.
Ask questions in the Spirit "Who offended you?"
It is not worth finding out the details and the reasons for which she was upset.
Here it is necessary to make a reservation: find out why the girl is crying, after all, it is necessary, but it is worth limking to the general answer.
Reference! That is, if the girl is crying because she, for example, heated a girlfriend, should not find out what exactly he said. It will make the girl once again worry the traumatic memories, and this is clearly not what she needs.
In addition, as a result of such issues, you risk falling under the crackle complaints and reproaches, even if they are unfair. In a state of hysteria, the girl can spill offense on the one who will turn to her arm, especially with irrelevant issues.
As a result, you will also be offended and hardly be able to hold your emotions. And this instead of soothing will lead to a quarrel that you are clearly not needed.
Try to solve all the problems here and now
No, of course, when the girl is crying, it often needs practical help, but later and only if she herself asks for her.
Imposing help without request undesirable:
- First, the crying person is not ready for active actions and making decisions right now, first you need to throw out my emotions and come to yourself.
- Secondly, all different views on problems and ways to solve them, so it is not clear whether the girl needs in the help you are ready to offer her.
Attention! I impose her ready-made decisions by her, you teach it to the learned helplessness that will not play neither her nor to her. It is better to wait for it to calm down and together think about ways out of the difficult situation.
Undract out other things
Psychologists around the world do not get tired of repeating: consolation in the spirit "And in Africa, children are starving!", I.e., an attempt to switch the attention of the suffering person to someone else big problems, does not work. Moreover, it can seriously harm.
The fact is that the sensations and perception of each individual, as well as the threshold of emotional stability. Therefore, the situation that can seem like a trifle, for example, scattered powder, sometimes becomes a real tragedy for a girl.
Reference! An attempt to derive this trouble will lead to the fact that a person will feel guilty in his feelings and, quite likely, completely lonely.
Give your girlfriend the opportunity to survive those emotions that she is experiencing, and just be this time next - she will definitely thank you.
Give impossible promises
An example may be: "I will do everything so that you stop crying!".
Also, you should not fill expensive gifts (fur coat, decoration, car, etc.):
- So you, firstly, you can teach the girl to manipulate you. After two or three sessions of such a "consolation", she will understand that everything that she needs to get the desired is just to cry.
- Secondly, it is worth respecting himself. The most precious thing that can give one person to another is care, participation and love. Do not put these truly precious things for one level with trickens.
We need a male girl, and it will not work off here.
Weekly girl can never talk anything in the spirit "myself is to blame!" (Even if it really is so).
It is believed that such a way can sometimes work, forcing a person to quickly collect and realize his mistakes, making conclusions for the future. But in fact, in the stressful situation, no one can analyze their actions, and reproaches and accusations you can only increase injury.
Attention! "Magic kick" is a very controversial consolation method, which will definitely not work on soft and gentle girls. In addition, it is guaranteed to destroy confidence. It is difficult to trust to those who finish lying.
How not to behave if a woman is upset, tells on the video:
How to console words at a distance?
One of the most difficult situations is when the girl is upset, and there is no one close to her. In this situation, the most reasonable will postpone all their affairs for a while (Of course, if the reason is serious) and come.
However, if there is no such possibility, do not worry: thanks to modern technologies, it is possible to reassure your favorite and at a distance:
- Call her. Messengers are good, but they are incomparable with the sound of voice. Speak calmly and affectionately so that the girl immediately felt support.
- Express concern about her condition. Do not be afraid if you get across aggression, it is not aimed at us. Aggression is simply one of the reactions of our psyche for stimuli. Be a good listener, as well as gentlemen and reasonable, and the girl will soon calm down.
- Say as many words of consolation and calm as possible. You can not touch it, it means that the maximum verbalize your tenderness and care. Call a girl by name - anyone is nice to hear your name - it is desirable, in a decreasing-gentle form. Remember all the gentle nicknames that she was given.
- Cheat it. It is not necessary to talk about problems all the time, sometimes the most wise conversation to something else, funny. It is also worth reminding a girl about the happy moments spent with you.
- Take care of a major note. Do not put the phone while the girl cries. Wait until she calms down and starts to see the lights in life - only then can the call be completed.
- Bear next. During the day, it is worth reminding a girl that it is not alone, sending various positive messages. You can carefully ask what she feels now. So she will feel yours is not indifference.
- Make her a pleasant surprise. It can be something very simple, like a funny picture or good quotes or sent by your favorite song. Another better ideas will send flowers or candy girls, the benefit of modern delivery services allow you to do it literally in a couple of hours.
Attention! If you know girlfriends or native girls, be sure to write them and ask for it in a difficult situation, at least until you can be next to it. Being surrounded by loved ones, she will definitely relax and calm down.
How to support your native person tells on the video:
If she is crying
Women's tears put in a dead end of many guys.
But to provide support in this situation is easy:
- Concentrate on a crying girl. At this moment, you should not be distracted for something else, so set aside the phone or laptop and go to her.
- Find out if she wants to be alone. Some people prefer to cry alone, and this desire is to respect. However, it is worth the real desire to be one of the situation in which the girl is simply offended or does not want to disturb you with their problems. If you know her well, you will understand it yourself.
- Hug it. Most girls love tactile sensations, so in the ring of hands of a loving man they calm down at times faster. Gently stroke her through the hair and sentence something affectionate - it will create a sense of security and peace.
- Give her to be flushed and spoke. Even if in your opinion she cries too much and for a long time, and several times repeat the same thing. It is better to immediately throw out all the emotions than to accumulate them in yourself, so be patient.
- Do not speak the following phrases: "Smile; calm down; quieter; stop doing that; thorough; stop roar; do not exaggerate; Well, again you have happened there; so what; not understood; Let's faster and so on. " Instead, you can say: "I'm here, near; I'm listening to; Speak, it is important for me; I understand that it is difficult for you; Maybe you want coffee or tea, let me do. "
While the girl is crying, refrain from the bills, almost anyone in such a situation does not appeal.
Your touch must be deprived of sexual subtext. First, calm the girl, and only later, in a great mood, she will be able to please you with a gorgeous night.
After the girl stopped crying, do everything in order to raise her mood.
For example, you can watch a funny film together or go cafe or walk.
Important! It is better not to try to console the girl with alcohol, but different delicious things may well work. Also, you should not choose to walk noisy places and active events, it can provoke a new stage of crying. It is better to go somewhere in nature.
The video describes the best ways to calm the girl:
If she threw her guy
In this situation, tears will be pulled by themselves, and it is quite justified. It is worth understanding that at one moment a person will not calm down, he will need time.
However, something you can do something:
- Tell me, what do you understand what she feels. If you also threw - mention this (however, do not translate the topic of conversation on your suffering!). For example: "I understand you very well and not say that it is a trifle. I know this condition when it throws a close man. I also cried, but time was smoothed. You will also become better, you will see. "
- Observe her further prospects. Sometimes after parting it seems that life is finished, but it is not. Try together to come up with how it can fill the released time. Here, surprises will be appropriate, for example, promise to bring it somewhere, "where you like it", and take the unusual restaurant.
- Do not rush to scold that the girl loved before. Love has not yet been faded, and hear insults of her beloved from another person will be unpleasant. In addition, you will fall into an awkward position if the couple comes out again. It is better to say that in this situation no one is to blame and, perhaps, hint that everything decided for the better.
- Let us understand that she can always rely on you. This is especially true if you are counting on the relationship with it. Tell me that she can contact you with requests and call at any time.
- Make her compliment. Tell me that it is beautiful and without difficulty will find a new relationship, even better for the same. Do not skimp on kind words, but try to speak sincere.
If you yourself hope to start a relationship with a girl, which is soothing, it is better to say about it right away, but it is primarily important for you to feel it and you just want to be nearby.
For example: "I understand that you still love him, and I do not want to use your parting. I'll just be there - not only because it is not indifferent to you, but as a friend who has the necessary help. "
After parting (yours with her)
This is a very difficult situation, because in fact, in tears, you will blame you yourself.
Reference! It is unlikely that she can cope with surgery emotions after unpleasant news that you part.
However, and here you can try to help:
- Do not blame her even in response to insults. Many can start expressing his claims after parting, but remember that emotions are now told in the girl, and not logic. Be higher this, wait until she calms down. Then you can calmly talk.
- Brew her hot sweet tea and offer chocolate. Chocolate increases the mood, and the sweet hot drink helps calm down.
- Tell me that you are ready to help her until she finds a new guy - let her do not feel completely lonely.
- Try to explain why you have decided to leave it. A little self-irony does not hurt, draw the girl a picture in which she will be beautiful, and you are unworthy.
- Tell me that you are very sorry that everything has happened exactly what you had to part. Show your emotions and be prepared to meet a squall of response.
If your favorite hysteria
The girl had blushed face, breathing, the movement of feverish, and tears roll on the cheeks? Most likely, she has a hysteria.
In this situation, ordinary words will be small.
First, it is worth remembering that Man in hysterics is close to the state of affect . He is not able to perceive little now, and not a word of calm, nor logical arguments will affect. The best thing you can do is to wait.
The hysteria lasts no longer than seven minutes, because the body is not able to function for a long time on the emotional limit.
Attention! At this time, do not move away from your beloved, because it can sneak yourself, but do not touch it without a pricing cause. Wait until the rapid phase is changed by quiet tears.
Now you can hug a girl and say that you love her very much and together you will definitely handle all the problems. It is also worth whining to her Valerian (only to know in advance whether it is possible to give a girl and in what doses).
Secondly, it is worth remembering that After hysteria always comes the recess . Your beloved need your participation. Take care that it is warm, lay down and dishes something delicious. You can see her good movie with her. Also worth take over part of home affairs.
After the girl calms down completely, it is worth talking to her about what led to hysterics, and together to come up with how to make the problem to be eliminated. Then you can be sure that the hysteria will not happen.
How to behave correctly, if a woman is hysterical, tells on the video:
Each guy is worth knowing how to calm the girl.
Taking advantage of the above councils, you can make three things at once - you will assist a person who has fallen into a difficult situation, strengthen the already existing relationships or may create new ones.
And remember: from time to time everything is sad, but with due support, any grief decreases or disappears.
In an adult man, the situation emerges sooner or later when he needs to calm the girl. Beautiful sexes are often excessively emotional and can be very worried about different situations. Guys are worth knowing how to console women correctly, in order to be confused not to lick out of the outside, sadness.
The life of all people does not consist only of happy moments, so everyone periodically faces difficult situations. The girls are especially inclined at such moments to get upset and worry. And it does not matter whether it happened on a serious occasion or on a trifling Feelings are always of great importance for women. Stay at such a moment without support is very hard.
Mistakes in behavior
Consolation is first of all the separation of the feelings and emotions of another person. It is important to make it clear that he is not alone in his misfortune. You need to be guys at this point aside, but to show interest to the problems of a loved one.
However, very often, instead of sincere care, people show the following mistakes in behavior:
- reading notation;
- Ambulance of other people's senses and emotions;
- Excessive nervousness.
Such methods will not succeed in reassuring a loved one, but there is a possibility to push it.
First of all, men should be tranquility. Do not be nervous and fuss. We can infect negative emotions, and the girl will begin to be sad even more. But unfortunately, next to a close man who is very upset, sometimes it is difficult to keep emotions.
A good way to calm yourself and crying a woman is to pour her a glass of water.
It is not recommended to find out in detail what it happened. The story about the subtleties and reasons can lead to the fact that the girl will have to re-live traumatic events. Of course, find out what happened, it is necessary, but it is worth limking to the general answer.
Do not attempt to immediately proceed to active search for solving the problem. In addition, in a state of hysteria, tips can be perceived as morals. It is also important to understand that the crying person first of all wants to throw out his emotions. If the girl needs the help of a young man in resolving the situation, then she will ask her after calming down.
Understate the emotions of a crying woman - the biggest mistake which man can make in an attempt to morally support. It is especially not necessary to try to switch the attention of the girls to the problems of other people. The fact that one seems to be a trifle situation for others is a real tragedy. Therefore, you need to give the girl the opportunity to survive your emotions and just be near her.
Sometimes whims and attempts of manipulation can manifest itself hysterical. In this case, it is important not to succumb to provocation. It is especially not recommended to try to drop the favorite purchase of expensive gifts. Otherwise, in the future, it can again resort to such a pressure method.
Algorithm of action
Most men at the sight of the hare of the tears who flow on their beloved cheeks are lost and do not know how to behave. Therefore, it is important to know how to calm the girl correctly, and not stand in a stupor, not knowing what to do .
- First of all, you need to hug a girl. At this moment it is not necessary to say something: a woman should just survive his emotions. Also during this period a man may think and try to assume what happened.
- The next step is important to demonstrate their interest and provide support. The girl in a difficult time for it is important to feel his beloved and know how much it means for a man.
- Not only to speak pleasant words, but also to confirm their actions. For example, you can feed the girl or organize a romantic date.
- You should not give extra advice and try to punish the details of what happened. It may exacerbate the situation and upset even more.
- It is impossible to reproach your favorite in a very susceptible character.
- After time, you can delicately offer your help in solving the problem.
Using these simple tips, you can easily calm the girl and achieve a happy smile from your beloved.
There are different situations in which a woman needs consolation. In each of them, a number of actions should be observed that helps to quickly encourage a loved one.
Consolation at a distance
A girl can be especially hard when she is upset, but there is no close man near. If a man is not possible to come to console her beloved, then this can be done on the phone.
Consoil the upset person by correspondence can be complicated. In SMS messages it is difficult to convey soothing words. It is much better to call the girl, because nothing will be compared with the voice of his beloved.
It is important to speak as calmly and gently as possible. It should be degraded and concern in conversation. The girl can react aggressively, but it is not necessary to be afraid of it, since it is only a protective reaction to a difficult situation.
You need to try to tell your beloved as much as possible words of calm and affectionate phrases, since at that moment it is not possible to hug it. You can call a close man with cute nicknames or just name in a diminutive form.
Sometimes a good solution - translating a conversation to another topic. Men should try to make a loved one or remind her of happy moments. This will help her to distract and forget for some time about problems.
It is very important not to hang the phone, interrupting the conversation while the girl continues to cry. It is also desirable to remind yourself during the day: call and write. You can even make a pleasant surprise for your beloved, for example, send a bouquet.
If she is crying
Men put women's tears in dead end. They are lost and do not know how to behave. But even in such a situation, you can support and calm down.
A woman can ask if she wants to be alone. Some people prefer to cry alone. And only after a few minutes of privacy, the girl will be ready to regret it.
If the woman is very upset, then you need to give her time to speak. Even if it seems that she repeats the same thing, it is worth listening to her carefully so that she can spill up all emotions.
There are a number of bad phrases that do not follow the girl at this moment, otherwise she can upset even more:
- "Enough to roar";
- "No need to exaggerate";
- "Come quickly";
- "nothing bad happened";
- "Do not invent".
It is desirable that in such complex moments of all the touches of men were deprived of sexual subtext. In this situation, it can upset the girl even more.
After my beloved calmed down, it is important to try to raise her mood. A romantic film, a walk or hike in a cafe can help.
Sometimes men have to calm their girlfriend who threw her boyfriend. At this point, you can bring your parting experience if it was. It is also important to speak that they understand the feelings of the girl well.
If a friend is very angry at this moment, then you can put together someone who offended it. But it is best to try to hint in such a situation that everything happens for the better. You need to give a girl the opportunity to spoil. You must also give to understand your friend that she can always rely on it.
Greetings to you, dear readers, especially young people! Girls are very emotional creatures that take everything close to heart. They can be touched while watching a sentimental film, to worry much because of the upcoming important event or simply loaded, because it rains on the street. Guys may seem insignificant or even ridiculous, but it is not so. For a girl is an emotional shock, and she needs support and consolation.
However, not all guys know how to calm the girl. Let's figure it out how to do it right and what can in no way be taken.
In order not to be confused at the sight of an upset girl, I advise you to remember certain actions that will accurately help her calm her.
The best courses on relationships - for men and women, lonely and in pairs, young and not very
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Try to find out the cause
It is possible that the girl herself does not fully understand why she became sad. Or simply does not want to talk about a true reason and explains all bad well-being. Nevertheless, try to be persistent, but acting gently and delicately.
Problems are very different. The more you learn about the situation, the faster you will understand how to react correctly. If the girl is experiencing a strong grief, for example, because of the loss of a close relative, then you should not joke, trying to make it laugh. If the reason is a quarrel with a girlfriend, it is possible to try to distract it. Just do not ask about the details. There are topics that do not discuss with men.
Let her speak
Sometimes the girl has the need to share their experiences, talk about what happens in her soul that she feels. It is possible that its monologue will be very emotional and will even be accompanied by a flow of tears. And if it is angry, the case can end the dishes and the crash of the furniture.
And on the contrary, the girl may look calm and say that he wants to be alone. Your task to understand - she really wants it or just says that, in secretly hoping that you will not leave her alone. I understand the problem not from the lungs. It all depends on how well you know your girlfriend.
Do not immediately offer her many solutions to the problem. When you need your advice, the girl must ask about it. To start, just give a man to speak.
Put down the phone to the side, close the laptop, do not run through the room. Focus on your girlfriend and on what she says. She should not have the feeling that you are in a hurry or you deeply indifferent to her experiences.
Do not interrupt her monologue with their comments or tips. However, listen to actively. Look her right in the eyes, rush your head (just do not overdo it), you can insert a small comment like: "I imagine how difficult it is for you." So she will understand that you really care about her. And not tormented it. Let be spoiled to the end.
Ask how to help her
When a girl fully speaks, ask you than you can help. Perhaps the reason for its experiences lies in a specific problem that can be solved together. For example, if she worries before the exam, help her to prepare. And if she is pregnant and afraid to go to the hospital, offered to go there together, by this you will find a friend moral support. Most likely, she feels lonely and lost, and your interest and suggestion of help will give her confidence and tranquility.
Just be near her
There are such situations when nothing can be done and fixed. If your girlfriend had a serious trouble, you just have to be there. Do not leave it alone with strong experiences. Try to cancel your plans if possible. Your presence and support will help her experience a difficult stage in life.
When she is bad, just tell me: "I am very sorry that you have to go through it." So you will express your sympathy. Perhaps your girlfriend will be a little easier, despite the fact that you cannot help her.
Even if she feels bad with PMS or during menstruation, your care and support will help her cope with this unpleasant condition and sort it painlessly.
How to calm the girl depending on the situation
In different situations, they will have to act differently so that the girl manage to calm down, and not aggravate her condition.
If it is far
If the girlfriend is far away, and you have no opportunity to come to her, then modern technologies will come to the rescue. You can comfort your girlfriend and at a distance.
- Call her . After all, reassuring the correspondence is quite difficult. No SMS can convey your real alarm for a girlfriend. And when she hears your native, calm and affectionate voice, she will immediately become easier.
- Tell me what is worried about her . Perhaps you will face aggression from the side of the girlfriend. However, most likely, this aggression is not aimed at you. It is just a psyche reaction. Therefore, calmly listen to the girl, try to be reasonable and gentle. Then she calms down very quickly.
- Tell her more worship words . At this point, you can't hug a girlfriend, stroke your hand, so we must try to console it with only words.
- Say goodbye to a good note . Before putting the phone, wait until the girl stops crying, calm down and start smiling again.
- Remind yourself during the day . So that your friend does not feel lonely, write her different pleasant messages in VC, in messengers, carefully wonder how she is doing. It will be nice to your attention and care.
- Make her a pleasant surprise . It may be just a good good phrase or touching message in verse. Even better if you use the delivery service services and send your girlfriend a bouquet of flowers or a box of candies.
Many of these tips may be useful when you go to the army. After all, your girl will hardly worry this moment.
If she is crying
Many guys are lost at the sight of a crying girl. However, it is possible to reassure it even in this situation. It is enough to do the following.
- Put down all things, smartphone, laptop and direct your attention to the girl.
- Hug firmly, foster on my head. In the arms of his beloved, she will feel protected.
- Let it be paid and speak. Be patient if, in your opinion, the girl crying too long and constantly repeats the same phrases.
- Bring a glass of water if she cries overvrapers. This will help restore breathing.
- Hanging her tears and offered to make tea or coffee. So you will show your care.
Do not stick to the girl while she cries. Your touch must be gentle, but without sexual subtext. Especially if it is very worried before the first time. No girl wants to have sex in such a situation. Be patient and gentle.
As soon as your girlfriend stopped crying, try to raise her mood. For example, you can offer her to take a walk. Just choose for a walk calmly light positive places. It is better to go to the park or in nature to the river or lake. Believe me, she will appreciate your concern and, quite possible, then thanks you during sex.
If she threw her guy
The girl who broke up with a guy is not on his own initiative, will consider himself abandoned, cry and worry very much. She will need a lot of time to calm down and come to Himself. Try not to leave it alone, if only she herself will ask about it.
In such a situation, you can do the following.
- Give her to understand that she can rely on you. Tell me that she can call you as a friend at any time and handle different requests. This advice is perfect for you, if you count on the relationship with this girl.
- In no case call the boys who threw it. It is possible that she still loves him, and the insult to listen to the beloved is not very nice.
- Try to tell how much more interesting around, and that life after parting has not ended. Invite in an unusual place where she will be able to distract from sad thoughts.
- Make an unobtrusive compliment. Tell me that it is very beautiful and easy to find a new guy, even better than the previous one.
- And then try to cheer her.
If she has a hysterical
You can determine the hysterics of the girl according to the following signs:
- Student breathing;
- Hand fevering;
- stream tears;
- Frightened face.
Hysteria is similar to the status of the affect. In such a state, the girl is not able to think logically. She does not hear any words. And in this situation you can only wait.
Usually hysterics lasts no longer than 7 minutes. The body is simply not capable longer to be in such a stressful state. All this time you have to be near your beloved, so that it does not harm himself or another person, if the hysteria happened on the soil of jealousy. Wait until the stormy phase and sobs will change with quiet tears.
Then it can be hugging it, to say how it is for you, and that together you will definitely handle all the problems. You can even offer her a light soothing like Valerian. Just learn in advance what medicine and in which dose you can take.
Hysteria takes a lot of strength from the body. Take care that your girlfriend was warm, it was where to lie down and than to eat. It will be better if she can sleep a little. As you know, in a dream, nervous cells although very slowly, but restored.
As soon as the girl finally calms down, discuss with her the cause of hysteria. Together you can come up with how to solve the problem so that this is no longer repeated.
I recommend to watch a video from a psychologist about how to calm the upset girl.
How not to behave
There are certain things that can not be done when trying to calm the girl. Such methods will not only fail to console a girlfriend, but also you can push it from yourself forever.
Nervous and fuss
It is extremely difficult to stay calm next to the crying girl who is also very expensive. After all, negative emotions are infectious. To reassure another person, it is necessary first of all to maintain iron calm.
Therefore, before starting to console, take a deep breath, exhale and pick up to 10. You can bring a glass of water for her and for myself.
Find out the details
I already wrote that it should be carefully trying to find out the reason why the girl is sad or crying. But do not ask for details and details of what happened. For example, if she quarreled with her friend, it is not necessary to ask, what words she called it. The girl will deepen again in the experiences, and you can also get under the hot hand. There is not far from the scandal.
Try to instantly solve all problems
Practical assistance must be provided only when the girl calms down and herself will ask for it. It is undesirable to impose its services for the following reasons.
- The crying person is not capable of active actions. Especially difficult in such an unstable emotional state to take reasonable solutions.
- The girl can have a look at the way out of the situation. Therefore, the help suggested by you can simply come.
If a person is imposed on the person already ready to solve problems, he will subsequently will not be able to make decisions themselves in difficult circumstances. This is called learned helplessness. When all your problems always solve other people for you.
It is best to discuss with the emergence of the situation with a calmed girl and come up with a joint decision.
The worst thing that can hear the worker girl is something like: "But okay you, it's not the end of the world!" Or "But in Africa, all children are starving, you are not so bad yet!" Even his friend, if a girl threw him, should not say that.
If you consider the reason for her tears of insignificant and trifling, do not tell her about it. Your task is to support. And this means that you just need to listen to the girl and be there.
Give impossible promises
You should not speak a crying girl that you are ready for everything, if only she stopped crying. Also, it is not necessary to try to pay off your beloved and promise her golden mountains as a consolation. Otherwise, she will learn to manipulate you. It will conclude that the best medicine from tears is expensive gifts. And to get the desired, just to cry.
After all, the most expensive thing that can give one person to another is care, attention and love. And they are more valuable any of the most expensive things.
Now you know how to reassure the girl in different situations, and what is categorically impossible to do. Apply these tips in practice, and you can always console the girl, and your relationship will be even stronger and warmer. Perhaps it will even serve as the beginning of a new relationship, if you are still in Frendzone.
How did you have to console the girl? Share in comments your experience!
It is no secret that girls are very emotional creatures. Therefore, a brief instruction on how to calm the girl, sooner or later, every representative of the strong sex is useful. So, what actions take to take the loud hysteria or quiet sobbing your second half?
Types of women's hysteria
Before starting to calm the girl, it is necessary to determine what caused its stormy emotions. Conditionally, they can be divided into two categories:
- whim . This is when the girl is trying to manipulate the satellite with tears and offense;
- more serious things . This is a truly complex situation, which means that one "not cry" here is definitely not going through here.
When you do not need to calm
If we are talking about manipulation, then the situation should be left as it is. No need to take anything to do anything if the girl simply decided to achieve his hysteria. Just allow the lover to throw out emotions and try not to get under her hot hand.
When soothing is needed
But there are situations where your presence is simply necessary. These include families related to family, health, work or school lover. This is really the same cases when a man is obliged to substitute his reliable strong shoulder.
So, how fast and, most importantly, effectively, calm your girlfriend?
1. Listen to its problem
The first thing to do is to listen to the reason for the tears of the girl. Try to be as careful as possible to understand the situation accurately and not asking two times about trouble. In the process of devoting you to the problem, the girl probably will experience relief.
Psychologists Choir claim: the problem that has been stolen, ceases to be catastrophic.
2. Hug it or take a hand
If appropriate, install physical contact with the girl. It has long been proven that tactile proximity acts soothing on any person. However, if the chosen is categorically against the arms, do not insist on its. So you only get out of it.
If the situation is not critical, use your sense of humor. Laughter is able to overcome any Handra and insult. Only it is not necessary to make a swirl directly above the girl (her growing ink, red from crying nose). Laugh at the situation or other participants.
The girl who is in depressed state is very easily conducted on manipulation. Why not use them in good intentions? Take the favorite from the cause of the disorder and dare to go together.
4. Buy chocolatec
Do you think this is the most banal council from all existing? Maybe it is. But does it matter when the recommendation really works? After all, everyone knows that chocolate is able to raise the mood. The delicacy contains substances that contribute to the production of hormone happiness.
When the situation is more or less "collapsed," suggest a girl to plan any joint thing. Let it be a trip to the cinema, a trip for a city or a romantic dinner. A pleasant event you both will wait for sure to save the girl from depressive mood.
How to support a girl at a distance.
How to support a girl in a difficult moment at a distance? If messages come from it: - "Damn, here it happened!", "I am so sad!" - These SMS are more dangerous than it seems. Sad phrasons in the Spirit: "Imagine me" or "Well, tell me something good" - only harbingers.
Further will follow a real test for strength. You won't pass it, and the consequences collapsed avalanche. Someone will remain without warm hugs, and someone will receive a significant scandal. Women, they are, they only give them a reason, and then before parting not far.
How to answer these incomprehensible replicas? What to say or do she felt like her beloved and protected?
Here is a short course of magical phrases and loyal actions that will help earn the trust of the ladies.
- First psychological assistance.
- 4 Main errors, which cannot be done.
- Secret and existing consolation methods:
Why is it important to be able to provide first psychological help?
Life is an unpredictable thing: the girl went to the session, then the guy is a business trip. And to visit nonresident relatives periodically necessary both. Situations, somewhere one in the departure is inevitable.
It is always nice after even short separation. However, it is difficult to communicate at a distance. Long conversations on the phone have to frank issues. But how to calm the girl in a difficult situation?
When you are nearby - no problems: hugged, kissed and the threat passed. In extreme cases can always be fed. Through kilometers, the usual schemes do not work.
Those men who were able to substitute their shoulder, being far away, won in the long run. At first glance, nothing can change, but the girl has printed on her orphanage: "The perfect guy is 80 leisure."
And one more bonus. The one who was able to neutralize the suffering woman will be able to agree even with terrorists. Pump your skill!
What can not be done in any case?
Do you think how to support a girl in a difficult moment at a distance? First read about the traditional mistakes of a strong half:
This is justified only if you are a surgeon. There are also benefits for firefighters. All. Whether you at least three times with a pilot, postpone the steering wheel and call back immediately. Otherwise, then you do not try through the wall of "everything is in order" and "yes no matter."
- "Sad emoticon from all diseases";
Even if it is not standard Emodi, but a fashion sticker -one will not replace words.
- "1000 and 1 solution option";
If it really is on the agenda, the issue of life and death, then the advice is relevant. But this happens not so often.
Offended aunt on the father's line? No need to offer a million ways to kill the cooling launcher. It is necessary to simply listen to the whole stream of offended words, periodically giveaway: "Here is an old fool!", "Mda, you said that she was not very, but I did not expect that", etc.
Forwarding is cool if you are a router. In other cases, it is better to take on a punch of female emotionality. Otherwise, at some important moment after a romantic dinner, you will also redirect you.
How to console a girl at a distance?
"We will come / - and we will discuss everything" - bad option. Imagine that you called in ambulance, and you are told: "The doctor will be in a week, then let's talk." Nothing, but blood from the wound is shy now. And a week later, everything either passes itself, either turn into a catastrophe. With maiden sophors - the same story. How to help dear favorite?
Do not know how to support the girl in a difficult moment at a distance? The best way is to talk. No wonder they use all psychotherapists.
There is a problem: do not everyone know what to say. Lifehak from Irwin Yalaa: You do not know what to say - say that you feel (you yourself, right now).
- Today it happened that this is. I am so sad.
- Listen, I do not even know what to say. I really want to support you, but I do not know how to do it when you are far away. If you were near, I would hug you and did not let go at all. Well, or at least the whole evening.
And now it's stupid somehow it turns out: my favorite girl is sad, but all I can have to try on the phone. For me, words - not the most weighty help, I would better spat the aunt, honestly. What do you think, from Minsk to Moscow ten?
By the way, the passage about "I would like to see how you answered her, you're fire!" Or "You even swear beautifully" also come.
If the dialog does not work, you can watch the series together: look at computers, but discuss in chat or by phone. "Put on a pause, I will go about coffee," is cute, especially when you are in different countries or cities.
Long letter with words, aha. Chur, not google! The clumsy honesty attracts more than the striking poars about the "blood-love-carrot".
What to write a girl? Write how you miss what happened, what do you think, what will happen when you meet.
You can send to Mail, but you can write on paper from hand. Here seriously, send a paper letter or a postcard by ordinary mail. It is not necessary to squeeze three sheets. We'll see how it goes. All the same, 95% - it will be the first time in her life.
If it's completely tight with ideas, Polystay Vishnevsky "loneliness in the network." Not necessarily to be sophisticated in erotic descriptions. Just look at how to communicate through the text. Sometimes it happens that it is very difficult to pronounce aloud the phrase. Write often it turns out easier.
You do not need to draw attention to the girl, give the girl to speak out. But when the first tension passed, you can slightly change the conversation aid.
"You're so sad today ... And I remember what you were happy when we went to the park." We will come, we will go again, we will drink coffee, feed the protein ... Do you think the ferris wheel already works?
"I feel so nice that you called me." Honestly, I always famered when you all told my friends, and not me. I want to know everything! Quite everything! What do you do: sit or lie? And what can be seen from your window? Tea or coffee, in the end?!
This can be anything: romantic / funny photo, funny video, sudden call on Skype from her beloved cafe or yard on a rayon.
In the photo you can:
- keep a sheet of paper on which it is written: "I love you";
- hug her photo in the frame;
- Drink from her cup, sleep on her side of the bed, they say, "I get closer as I can";
- Clean, shave, cook food - "desperately preparing for the meeting";
- Walking around her house - "Karaulu", etc.
Ideas for video (can be accelerated, it will be cool):
- 10 reasons, because of which I am waiting for you (everything is happening - and about love is unrestrained, and about the pies of Godriga).
- That's how I miss (eat soluble noodles, I lay under the blanket and re-looking the film that we last looked together, the cat misses - you see, the face is sad).
- This city is sad without you (the coffee kiosk looks sadly, ducks in the lake crack without enthusiasm).
If you still have no time - it's time. Wagon options: to be convened on the way to work or at the lunch break, send selfie before going out of the house, drink "together" coffee, photo cups and sending each other, send compulsory messages in messengers in the morning and / or evening, to tell how the day went. In rituals, the most important thing is not to pass without a pricer reason.
Many domestic troubles can be destroyed at a distance. Ask a friend to go to fix the socket or reinstall Windows. Find a normal phone repair service. Call an ambulance or plumbing - depending on the situation.
Options for those who have a salary today:
The person who canceled the plans threw everything and arrived - it happens once in his life. Of course, you do not need to run away from the state examination, because the girl crashed a favorite cup. But finish the cases early to stay together an overall day - it is real. It is always nice to know what to rush to you.
Now full of services delivering flowers 24/7 and receiving payment by the card. Still deliver candy and plush bears.
Delivery food is better than any antidepressant. And in a small town you can find a place that sushi or pizza delivers. And in the megapolis couriers, even the desired marmalade variety will find in the supermarket and deliver an apartment to the doors.
By the way, you do not want to be sad on the full stomach.
- Send parcel / gift.
Quickly this can be done through delivery services, for example, DHL Express. Although if the separation is long-term, then there is no place to hurry. You can test the usual mail.
Unpack the parcels - separate pleasure. It is interesting to get all sorts of little things: a metro flank, a ticket on a trolleybus, a magnet, funny socks ("I saw in the store, could not resist"), local candy, chips or coffee.
You can play: "At the trip, I read this book, I send you. It will be a minute - read, pliz. I want to discuss from there a couple of moments. "
Support, it means to save
Calm the upset girl is how to walk through a minefield: each step can deprive an important organ. Fortunately, you can "persist" and begin again.
Do not be afraid of calls? Try. And be careful, there are side effects. If a girl honors in you a person who does not feel sorry for her spiritual strength, you can accidentally detect yourself in the registry office. Ready for such a turn?
I hope you now have an understanding how to support the girl in a difficult moment at a distance.
Girls are extremely emotional and unpredictable. They may be angry and cry because of a trifling situation. And may be silently transfer heavy news. Emotional bursts - frequent guests in the life of the girl.
Sometimes men are lost in front of female tears and gusts of anger, cannot understand the cause and affect its condition. A man is very important to understand how to reassure your favorite girl with words, gestures, action.
When you do not need to react to female emotions i
Women are not only weak creatures, but also very insidious. Most girls love to manipulate men. Management methods are varied: sex, tears, resentment, hysterics, silence, parting. Through these techniques, women are trying to achieve full attention, material values (expensive decorations, cars, fur coats) or subordination. In many cases it is possible.
Each man has their weaknesses when he is ready to do everything to please the faithful time. And women are very taking place on weak partner places. An experienced manipulator is difficult to calculate. These are usually erased, vague causes.
Often, men hear the claims of type: "You don't love me, I'm leaving for my mother," I looked at that girl in the blue skirt, "" I do not give me flowers, and her husband girlfriend presented her Lexus, "" Do not appreciate my mother, "" Work a lot, well, and that that you provide me, my dog and the whole nurse. "
These are whims. No motivated whims. Such hysteries are better to ignore. A clever woman will understand that this method does not work. Smart and will not resort to such tricks, but any woman sometimes "demon confuses." The spoiled, capricious girl needs to be collected from these techniques. If a person does not want to change, may not spend time and nerves on such a person.
Women's emotionality and men's caress 2
Women tend to take everything close to heart. They do not have uppirodnoe resistance and restraint that in men. Sometimes it is sometimes vital to face experiences. Even the strongest and independent girl needs an effortless male shoulder.
What are the actions of a man? Do not stay indifferent. This is a favorite girl. When she is evil, annoyed, upset or killed grief, it seems to her that she is one against the whole world. A man should show his support, protection.
Important reception - hug. With my own hands, a man makes it clear that he is near. So he, her defender, who closes her, small, from all evil, that causes her peace. Male warmth gives a woman a sense of security, it reflexively relaxes. The man himself can feel how her shoulders will be relaxed quickly, it is worth making a girl in an embrace.
You need to give the girl time to cool, spoil, spoke. Sometimes words do not need. The girl is important to understand that a man is near and listens to her. This is a big gesture of support and empathy.
How to calm girls? To begin with, you should ask what happened. Understand the reason for the commercial burst. Often the girl answers the banal "nothing". It is uncompressed by hand and retreat. The girl still needs help and consolation, although does not show it. A man is worth keeping calm and patience. Nick What is irritation and anxiety, the girl will immediately feel, and it is more annoying.
After finding out the cause of the bad mood of the girl to artist should be a consolation word. "I'm near", "everything will be fine", "I'm with you." Not pending words and expressions. Simple support words produce more effect than complex veiled phrases.
When the girl calmed down a little, you can dilute the sad tension. A light joke can discharge the situation and take a girlfriend from heavy thoughtful. The man should look into her eyes, smile, say a couple of comforting phrases, erase the tears from the cheek.
These minor manipulations are very pleasant to girls. She will relax, let go of the tension and respond to a grateful smile. It is not necessary to stop caking, it will not be superfluous to call a girl, remind about how the road is him.
Do not joke if the loss of a loved one has caused the cause of the nervous breakdown. In this case, even a harmless abandoned phrase will become inappropriate. It is better to lay a girl on the sofa and make a simple action such as hug a girl. You should brew tea or to give a glass of water. It is necessary to give a woman to understand that she is not broken, she is not alone. She has a reliable support. After a while, you can recall the bright and warm moments associated with the youthful person.
Men's voice should be soft, in his words should be kept notes of tenderness and care. Speaking should be slightly muffled, half-seam. So the girl will feel great intimacy and sweeping together.
Finally, she soothes the nerves to change the situation. Mysteries to bring loved for a walk, in a cafe or ride a winery car.
Probably, every boyfriend has soon or later a moment occurs when you need to calm the girl. Female sex - creatures emotional, susceptible to experience various situations. If you know how you can console your soul mate, it will be a plus for both of them.
Before making any steps, find out what happened to your girlfriend. You must clearly distinguish 2 different situations :
- These may be simple whims, with which the girl is trying to manipulate you.
- She really happened to something serious. For example, nonlands in the family, re-examine the exam, etc.
When the girl is not worth soothing
This is just the first case. For example, you did something, she pretended that she didn't like her very much and rolled the scandal. The goal of such whims is a provocation: so that you apologize to feel guilty, and perhaps I called my "guilt" materially.
Try to take a look at your action, which caused such a rapid reaction from the girl. If it seems to you that everything is fine, then it is. Do not give up for a provocation and do not take any action. Next time, the girlfriend will know that you are not working for such things.
When a girl should calm down
Talk to her, find out what happened. Sometimes simply from the fact that it will share its problem, will be easier. Depending on the situation, act further: firstly, hug it. It helps a lot, after all, the arms cause a sense of protection and tranquility. Then, after you understand what the situation is, expressing your opinion on this account.
How to calm the girl with words
Try to look at her problem from an optimistic point of view and tell me that not everything is so bad as she thinks. Suggest a possible option of resolving the situation and give it to understand that you will support it in every way and you will do everything possible in order for the situation to normalize. Even if you do not know what a way out to offer in her question, nevertheless try to make it clear that the situation is somehow solvable.
In conversation, use the following replicas:
"Everything will be fine"
"You're not alone, you have me"
"You can always count on my help"
How to calm the girl at a distance
If the girls are not near, keep a constant connection with it through the phone, messenger, social network. Try to make it the impression that, despite the distance you are next to her. Tell me that if she does not happen again, immediately called you, and you will support it.
How to calm the crying girl
The crying girl you just need to hug firmly, and in this position it is up to a few minutes. While she cries, even better not much to talk. In your arms, she quickly calms down quickly, and then you can talk to her.
How to console a girl
So that your girl felt peace, first of all, you need to take non-verbal actions. That is, there are less than words. To do this, use hugs, touch, kisses, stroking. In the room where you are located, create a pacifying environment: Cutting curtains, burn aroma lamp with essential oil (it is well soothing the psyche). You can make water procedures - take a bath together.
After the girl came to himself, you can go on the fresh air to walk, go to the cafe. This will help change the situation and distract from different thoughts.